Becoming A Woman of Influence

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Proverbs 31:30
“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” 

This past spring, I had the honor to speak in a church on Mother’s Day morning.  They asked if I would speak on the subject of Deborah from Judges 4:6-7.

At first glance, I thought this would be a short message.  There’s very little written about her, but as my team and I began to dig, we uncovered a very interesting woman.

In short,  I’ve got a woman crush on Deborah now!   She has even become the topic and inspiration of my message at the August Luncheon!

But first, let me tell you a little about Deborah:  Talk about a strong alpha woman!  History records show she was both a prophetess and a judge.   More notably, Deborah is the only judge to hold the distinction of both prophet and judge.  In Israel’s history, men typically held positions of power both politically and spiritually.  But during this generation, Deborah held these offices.


  • Deborah was married.  She was known as Labidoth’s wife.
  • She was childless.  Although she referred to herself as “Israel’s Mother.”

I find it interesting that Labidoth was not known as Mr. Deborah.  This tells me that despite her stature politically, in the home, she was a woman who followed God’s order.

  • Deborah seems to be the only one in her generation who was spending time with God.
  • She was a woman of courage, conviction, and confidence.

People were drawn to Deborah.  They came to her for advice and for wisdom.

  • Deborah was a mentor, a role-model, an encourager;
  • She inspired others to know God and to live for Him.
  • She was the quintessential Proverbs 31 woman minus the children.  (However, she lived before Solomon wrote Proverbs.)

At the Lord’s command, Deborah inspired one man to put together an army to fight the Goliath of their day.  At the time Israel was out-powered; out-manned; outnumbered.

But because Deborah knew God; had established a relationship with God; she believed God.   She, in turn, influenced one man, who influenced 10,000 to believe God too.  Together they believed that God was bigger, stronger, wiser, more strategic, more cunning than any enemy they faced.

When the day of battle came, they stepped out in faith together. God moved in response to their faith and gave them victory over the enemy.   The conclusion brought Israel peace from her enemies for 40 years.

I feel it is important to note from this account from Scripture how one woman made her relationship with God the priority of her life and ultimately influenced the destiny her generation.

God is the same today.   He wants to raise up Deborah’s today that impact their spheres of influence.Women who:

  • are willing to spend time with God.
  • are willing to do what He calls them to do.
  • are willing to live a life that may look a different than the world around them; and
  • are willing to be conduits of blessing to hurt and dying world.

When we commit to these actions, we can become Deborah’s in our generation.

Join me!  August 24 @ 11:30.   We can be women of influence.   Women who live lives that matter before the God of the Universe.

After all, isn’t that what life is all about?

Luncheon – Thursday August 24th
Register Today!

10 Reasons to Establish a Quiet Time

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“But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in Him.
They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.”
Jeremiah 17:7-8

A quiet time is when you deliberately set aside a period of time to read your Bible; to hear God’s voice and to commune with Him through prayer. 

For years, my quiet time has been one of the best moments of my day.  (I pray it never ends.)  In fact, I have a hard time navigating life without it.  

One morning while reading the Psalms, a picture of a treasure chest came into my mind.  Verses jumped out at me that reminded me of perfect, rare, pure gold coins.  One by one, I gathered them and carefully stored them in my prayer journal.  Desperately wanting to internalize them…  In hopes of believing them in my core and incorporating them into my everyday life.

Last week, I taught a workshop on Quiet Time.  This week, I’ll teach a workshop on Prayer and Prayer Journaling.  In my preparations, I started brainstorming reasons why I think a quiet time is far more rewarding than anything else the world has to offer. 

A quiet time helps us to:

  1. Know God personally; To know how to be right with Him.  To know what pleases God and how He desires to be worshiped; To establish and maintain relationship with Him.
  2. To have our souls fed and nourished.
  3. To have our hearts, minds and motives purified; To have the awareness of His forgiveness.
  4. To receive personal revelation; to know God’s will for the situations in our life and our purpose for each season.
  5. To not be deceived by false teaching or false ideology.  (And it’s out there!)
  6. To be fortified to persevere when life is hard.
  7. To be strengthened against conformity to the world’s pattern of behavior.
  8. To receive fresh courage to do what otherwise we may never do in service to the Lord.
  9. To become a better wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend and citizen.
  10. To receive hope when we feel hopeless; strength when we feel emotionally and physically weak and perspective when we see the world becoming increasingly evil and godless. 

I could go on and on! 

The fullness of these things CANNOT happen by attending church or group Bible study once a week.  It only happens when we carve out time on a regular basis to spend time with our Heavenly Father.   The One who created us.  The One who is for us.  The One Who loves us beyond what we can imagine. 

Do you have an established quiet time and prayer time?  All it requires is: 

  • A commitment of setting aside a set amount of time each day (or most days) 
  • An open heart that’s willing to hear what God may lay upon your heart. 
  • A Bible; a notebook or a Journal  

The quality of my life changed when I began seeking the Lord on a regular basis.  No matter how awesome your life may be, apart from Jesus, there’s an empty hole in your life. 

Make time for Him today.  He’s waiting for you…  with open arms.

To Learn More about Establishing a Quiet Time:
and knowing God Personally

(Formerly known as Intimacy with God)


Join us for our 2nd Annual
Mother/Daughter Retreat

Early-Bird Registration now Open – Limited to 50 Registrants


Worship:  Lacy Hines


The Most Influential People in a Teenager’s Life

“Train a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not turn from it.”  Proverbs 22:6

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I never cease to be amazed at the indoctrinational garbage the world throws at our kids.

It’s continual.  And seems to always reach new lows.   Most every message on television, movies, song lyrics and celebrity is a chorus of rebellion to the truths of Scripture.  Some of my biggest peeves:

  • encouragement of sexual immorality with no consequence,
  • laziness and disrespect to authority;
  • no absolutes of right and wrong
  • utter denial of accountability to anyone much less to our Creator one day.

And clothing?   Don’t even get me started.  Finding clothes for a teenage girl that doesn’t promote her being a hoochy-mama is nearly impossible.

Honestly, raising kids in a social media/red carpet age can be very discouraging.  When weighing positive vs negative influences, I often feel very outnumbered.

But praise be to God, there’s hope!

I’m reading a book called, How to Get your Teen to Talk to You.*  I’m pleasantly surprised at what I learning.  While television, social media and a child’s friends are influential, they are not the most influential.

Drum roll please…

The most influential people in a teenager’s life are:

  1. Parents
  2. Extended Family
  3. Adults outside the home – coaches, youth workers, teachers, friends of parents
  4. Peers
  5. Media – TV, movies social media and music

Whether we know it or not, we, as parents, aunts, grandparents and friends are role models to the teenagers/young adults in our lives.   When looked at through this lens, what a unique opportunity that’s been given to us!

However,  the book warns whenever parents are too busy or when extended family moves away, or when there is no connection with adult role models, peer influence and media will win every time.*

Teens are desperate for love, acceptance, grace, discipline and boundaries.  They also crave a healthy, functional life rhythm.  

But most importantly,  they were created to know their Creator in a personal relationship.  They desperately need the positive influence of God’s Word gently shared and lived out before them.  They need to see what it means to live by Scriptural convictions.  They need to see Biblical principles at work in our everyday lives and decisions. 

So that one day,  our God will become their God.

God promises when we make His Word our plumb line; our North Star; our starting point of determining right from wrong,  it will have an impact on our families. 

I’m counting on it.  Because it’s all I have in combating the world’s continual indoctrination.

By the way,  when your teen says, “Mom, your judging…”    Know this is a message straight from the heart of the world.  (This has been said to me.)

My response?

Without apology.  Without flinching.  As loving as I can be, “No, no sweet one,  I’m discerning right from wrong.  And that’s wrong.  That behavior, if continued, will bring years of hardship and heartache…”

*How to Get your Teen to Talk to You, Connie Grigsby and Kent Julian (p26)


Making God’s Word your Plumb Line
starts with Quiet Time & Prayer


Establishing a Daily Quiet Time, July 27

Leading a Bible Study Group with Different Personalities, August 2

Growing in your Prayer Life through Journaling, August 3

Join us for our 2nd Annual
Mother/Daughter Retreat

Early-Bird Registration now Open – Limited to 50 Registrants


Worship:  Lacy Hines


Serving with KGM

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The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few.”  Matt 9:37 

Jesus fed 5000 people with 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish.

An amount that was completely insufficient on it’s own. However, when offered to Jesus, He took their little bit; blessed it; and fed over 5000 people.  Scripture tells us there were even left overs!  (See John 6)

Maybe you don’t feel sufficient on your own.  But would you consider offering Jesus your little bit?    We’re looking for women in Raleigh/Cary and the surrounding areas…

  • Who love the Lord;
  • Who want to know Him better;
  • ​And who desire to make Him known…

God has given us great ideas to reach women with the reality of Jesus in everyday life.  But we need help.   We’re looking for women who want to serve in these areas:

  • Luncheon
  • KGM @ Nite
  • Leading Bible Studies
  • Prayer Team
  • Communications Team
  • ​Retreat/Conference Team

​You don’t have to be sister super Christian to serve!  You just need to be willing to offer Him

  • Your little bit of time;
  • ​Your little bit strength;
  • Your little bit of knowledge.

He’ll take our little bit and miraculously feed a multitude!   ​

Contact us is you’re interested in learning more.


Establishing a Daily Quiet Time, July 27

Leading a Bible Study Group with Different Personalities, August 2

Growing in your Prayer Life through Journaling, August 3

Join us for our 2nd Annual
Mother/Daughter Retreat

Early-Bird Registration now Open – Limited to 50 Registrants


Worship:  Lacy Hines

6 Lessons in Parenting Teenagers

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“Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.”  Psalm 90:12

Do you remember Charlie Brown’s teacher?   She was never seen.  Only heard.  She made noise.  But her words were never audible.

My kids often make me feel like Charlie Brown’s teacher.  

Just yesterday, my 15 year old daughter told me, “Mom, stop with all the lessons – I get it.  I know not to post a picture of myself in a bathing suit.  I know to make good decisions.”

I’m telling you, no one can make you feel smaller and more insignificant then your teenage daughter.  Praise God my identity is not based on what she thinks of me.

Parenting is harder then I ever imagined and getting harder.   I have two years left before my oldest leaves for college.  I seriously wake up at night wondering if I’m teaching him everything he needs to know.  If I’m properly preparing him for the world outside of our home.   And more importantly, to know and love the Lord, the most important thing we can do as parents.

Many days, I feel like a failure.  My kids are past the age of mini-sermons.  (Which they’ve heard plenty of.)  So now, I really have to choose my words and moments carefully.

As I’ve cried out to God over my insecurities,  He’s leading.  Here are some of the ways:

  1. My quiet time is essential.  It’s what makes me a wiser, kinder, peaceful, and more patient mom.  He gives me ideas on ways to connect with them.  Ideas that are not my own.  He equips me to live the Word, not just preach it.

2.  Live the Word – From everything I’ve read and learned from others, kids learn more from what they see,  then what their parents say.  Pounding truth into them, which is what I often want to do, is not effective.  I have to be sincere and gentle.  I have to love them.  I have to keep lines of communication open. I have to pray for opportunities to say a word at the appropriate time.

3.  Prayer – It’s the most important thing I can do.  My problem is making sure I don’t allow complacency to set in and fail to pray. 

I’ve started praying very specifically.  I’ve asked God for a Word to pray for each…  A promise from His Word that I can pray over them.   Once a week, I cover them in prayer.  But daily, they are lifted before the throne.   Prayer is warfare.  Prayer is powerful. 

4.  Reach out to other women – Specifically women who are older and wiser.  Women who have lived through this season of parenting.  I have a wonderful Mom, who, God bless her, survived me as a teenager. Older women have so much to offer.  They have experience and wisdom; a perspective we simply do not have.  A small community of Titus women is essential.

5.  Speak their love language.  I’m learning to be intentional about doing what they love to do – even when I have no interest.  I’m also learning not just to listen, but to hear them.  No easy thing for a busy, working Mom.  Connection to the leadership of the Holy Spirit is vital.  Hearing them and loving them is the gateway to their hearts.  It’s ultimately an opportunity for my witness to be credible and my words to heard.

After all, I don’t want to be Charlie Brown’s teacher…

Summer Workshops to Grow your Faith Walk!


Conversations that have Impact, July 11

Establishing a Daily Quiet Time, July 27

Leading a Bible Study Group with Different Personalities, August 2

Growing in your Prayer Life through Journaling, August 3

Early-Bird Registration now Open

Limited to 50 Registrants

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