Struggling with Letting Go?

This man’s name was Nabal, and his wife, Abigail, was a sensible and beautiful woman. 

1 Samuel 25:3

This week I take a bit of a break from my traditional blog to offer a more personal perspective.

Not too long ago, I was reading Abigail’s account in the Bible that is found in 1 Samuel 25. Among her many descriptors is sensible. The word struck me, so I looked up its meaning.

To be ‘sensible’ is defined as “having or using good sense or sound judgement. Cognizant. Keenly aware. Actions based on reasons not emotion.” 

I don’t know about you, but I could use a healthy helping of sensibility in my life right now. You see, I am entering a new season where I’m trying to make choices based on reason and not emotion. Within a few months’ span, I will have turned 50, graduated my youngest from high school, sold a house I love, renovated and moved into a new home, and become an empty nester. It is a season of heightened emotions and change to say the least.

Let’s start with my daughter: I shamelessly admit that I held back both of my children in kindergarten, so I could have another year with them. Yes, I am that mom. But I’ve never regretted the decision. And now that extra year I enjoyed is coming to a close.

Caroline leaves for college in August. She made the difficult decision to enroll in my husband’s and my alma mater rather than wait on her dream school that deferred her – only to learn a month later she was accepted. Yet, she stood by her original decision, wanting to take charge of her life. I’m proud of Caroline. I love who she has become and especially that she still walks into my arms first thing in the morning for a long hug. I’ll miss those hugs when she leaves.

Letting our kids go is part of God’s plan. I know this in my mind. My heart is having a hard time being sensible and accepting this part of the plan.

Change begets more change. My husband and I decided to take advantage of the hot real estate market in our area and sell our house. It seemed like a good idea, might I say even a sensible idea, at the time. The house sold the first day.

But now the reality of leaving my house, the street, and neighborhood that I love is here…being sensible is not so easy.

My current house is my dream house. Many summer nights are spent on floaties in our pool, and in the fall, we hang out by the fire pit. Not only that, but this house has something else I’ve dreamed of since childhood – bathroom drawers for makeup!

We’ve spent some of the most joy-filled years of our lives here. But with both children gone, it’s time to move on. At the end of the month, we’ll hand the keys over to the new owner who will make their own memories, and we’ll move to a smaller home.

My heart has been sad with all this change.

But early one more morning, Luke 17:33 jumped out at me: “Do not cling to the things of this world.” The word, ‘house’ should have been in the text because that’s what I heard, “Don’t cling to this house, Tara.”

So, I’m not clinging, either to my house or to my daughter. Like Abigail, I’m telling myself, “Be sensible.” It is a new season. A new home. An empty nest and a new decade!

So when you see me around, remind me that in this new season I am not only choosing sensibility, but I’m also choosing gratitude. Gratitude for the years God has allowed me to be a mom of young kids. Gratitude for the years He gave me in my dream home. Gratitude for my new home that I will make my new dream house.

After all, this world is not my permanent home.

“For this world is not our permanent home; we are looking forward to a home yet to come.” Hebrews 13:14

Oh, and by the way, my new home has drawers in the bathroom for my makeup! ☺


VIRTUAL WORKSHOP
Intentional Parenting — Planning Meaningful Summer Fun

— THURSDAY, JUNE 24TH  

VIRTUAL LUNCHEON

Turning Your Personal Tragedy into God’s Glory

— WEDNESDAY, JULY 14TH  

Author: Tara